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Bashers Cricket Club

The Ballad of Roland Heath

39, early September
The call was out, history remembers
Each Munkton man was a contender
Excepting one with his disfigured member

Roland Heath
Roland Heath
Lower Munkton’s 
Roland Heath

Norton Big Four boondoggle
Never hard on the throttle
Leather helmet and flying goggles
Billowing scarf drawing ogles

Not the only blowing being done
Wives in the valley barring none
Sampled the over-eager tongue
Of the wayward club shafted one

Roland Heath
Roland Heath
Ladies loved some
Roland Heath

It was a concentual pillage
From his Father’s shop in the village
To the estates of great privilege
Not only groceries were delivered

Millicent Dufresne hyphen Smythe
Was The Earl’s trophy wife
Roland was generous with his knife
The soprano wailed for all her life

Roland Heath
Roland Heath
Say his name
Roland Heath

For a decade Millicent scored
But the clues could not be ignored
When he found out the indignant Lord
Brandished his old regimental sword

Roland promptly fled the scene
His life becoming clandestine
Munkton village cricket team
Were down a Third Man for the foreseen

Roland Heath
Roland Heath
Where is he?
Roland Heath

Skip to 1963
With socialite Persephone 
A Soho club named the Jamboree
Space dogging night very second Tuesdee

How much space can a dog cram?
They went too far, It was a terrible plan
He took off but he did not land
Our hero perished when the Shit hit the Fan

Roland Heath
Roland Heath
Rest In Peace 
Roland Heath

Roland Heath
Roland Heath
We miss you 
Roland Heath

The Ballad of Roland Heath Karaoke Version
More Dr Seuss than Shakespeare Up close and personal with the Bashers
Unusually quiet around here


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