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Bashers Cricket Club

2013 Awards

As presented over kebabs and beer at Kebabs on the Grille on Friday 22 November 2013.

  • P.T. Barnum Award for There’s A Sucker Born Every Minute
    Max “Hot Head” Allwright
  • Mark Waugh Award for Second Best Player In His Family
    Denzyl “Cranky” Allwright
  • Willie Nelson Award for Most Fines
    Jack “Dags” Sheppard
  • E.T. Award for Overstaying
    Kaylan “Sinbad” D’Silva
  • Rocky Balboa Award for Comeback of the Year
    Channa “Made In” Phillip
  • King Ludwig II Award for Protecting The Castle
    Ainsley “Pusher” Mann
  • Marco Polo Award for Taking the Great Chinese Invention of Cricket Back to the Old World
    Alex “The Jaguar” Pezzani
  • Nina kiu Tafadhali nataka bia baridi
    Kaylan “Sinbad” D’Silva
  • Reverend Lovejoy Award for Dedication on Sundays
    Darren “Dazzler” Manning
  • Peyton Manning Award for Having Babies Named After Him
    Jack “Dags” Sheppard
  • Colonel Sanders Award for Counting Chickens Before They’re Hatched
    Glen “Growler” Rowell
  • China Eastern Award for Punctuality
    Mei “Sharapova” Chunhua
  • Oleg Gordievsky for Double Agent Award
    Phil “Filthy” Mildenhall
  • Holly Hobbie Award for Quilting
    Irfan “Smurfy” Idrees
  • Sir Edmund Hillary Award for Knocking the Bastard Off
    Phil “Shandy” Childs
  • Paul Howard Award for Eating all the Pie
    Kevin “Cassius” Wright
  • Fairy Godmother Award for Making Coaches Shrink
    Steve “The Toe” Cliff
  • Sam “Mayday” Malone Award for Being Last to Leave the Bar
    Sean “The Korean” Malcon
  • iPhone 5S Award for being Hard to Get
    Stephen “Tantric” Bradley
  • George Bradshaw Award for Scheduling
    Sam “Swahili” Finnerty
  • Joh Bjelke-Petersen Award for being a QUEENSLANDER!
    Jake “Spanky” Anderson
  • Tele Savalas Hairstyle Award
    Thisura “Dot” Wijepala
  • George Remus Award for Bootlegging
    Mik “Sicknote” Pathi
  • Greta Garbo Award for Great Legs
    Tom “Latex” Ash
  • Cookie Monster Award for Eating Cake
    Jackie “Smoochie” Lindsen
  • Jimmy Page Award for Best Solo Performance
    Paul “Shrek” Turner
  • Charlie Chaplin Award for being the Biggest Hobo
    Andy “Tank” Scott
  • NY Yankees Award for Recruiting
    Justyn “Scooby” Field
  • Alfred Zehden Award for Anti-Magnetism
    Dave “Peking” Tacon
  • Richard Simmons Award for Short Shorts, Socks & Sandels
    Adam “Post Op” Baker
  • Lionel Richie Award for Going All Night Long
    Sameer “Paps” Jolly
  • David Hasselhof Award for Best Performance in a Non-Acting Role
    Ben “Pope Benedict CXCV” Collins
  • Meryl Streep for Best Supporting Actress
    Chris “Lunchcutter” Wade
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger Award for Going Commando
    Alex “Fruitbox” Brown
  • Abebe Bikila Award for Stamina
    Shaun “Golden Shears” Lear
  • Free Willy Award for Esky Riding
    Paul “Woodstock” Howard
  • Elton John Award for Having Parties We’re Not Invited To
    Mal “Omega” Collins
  • Hugh Hefner Award for Contributions to the Porn Industry
    Oli “Hustler” Wilson
  • Eric Moussambani Award for Getting to the Finish Line
    Simon “Pigu” Dixon
  • Bart Cummings Award for Backing a Winner
    Norman “Mouse” Lau
  • Sly Dunbar Award for Rhythm
    Ian “JR” Rowell
  • WD-40 Award for Unintended Use of Kit
    Neal “Birdshit” Watkins
  • The Common Cold Award for Going Viral
    Andy “Tank” Scott
  • Casey Kasem Award for Worst Music
    Denzyl “Cranky” Allwright
  • Julia Childs Award for Catering
    Desmond “Long Dong” deSilva
  • Michael Jordan Award of Player of the Year in Another Sport
    Mike “Tubby” Hall
  • Hans Christian Andersen Award for Fairy Stories
    Simon “Genghis” Pendergast
  • Fernand Petiot Award for Relentless Hangover Cure Research
    Adam “Spanner” O‘Brien
  • Usain Bolt Award for Best Victory Celebration
    Travis “Swoop” Weir
  • Mrs. Doubtfire Award for Mother of the Year
    Ollie “Stats” Austin
  • Paula Abdul Award for Cheerleader of the Year
    Michael “Prancer” Vertuli
  • John Wayne Bobbit Award for Scoring With An Injured Appendage
    Tim “Tiny” O’Connell
  • Fidel Castro Award for Upsetting the Anti-Basher
    Jen “Inky” O’Connell
  • Quade Cooper Award for Choking
    Bashers Business
  • Geoff Hurst Award for being a Hat Trick Hero
    Paul “Shrek” Turner and Ben “Pope Benedict CXCV” Collins
  • Rosa Parks Award for Bus Tourist of the Year
    Jenny “Peecup” Soriano
  • Roger Federer Award for Best Website Returns
    Ollie “Stats” Austin
  • Prince George of Cambridge for Newcomer of the Year
    Steve “Poppy” Field
  • Pamela Anderson Award for Most Improved
    Mark “Shit Shoes” Henwood
  • Bart Simpson Award for Sledging
    Richard “Parrot” Yates
  • Alessandro Pezzani Award for Best Dressed
    The Legends
  • Geisha of the Year
    John “Inquisition” L’Epagniol
  • Tourist of the Year
    Manoj “à Trois” Zalpuri
  • Indoor Player of the Year
    Mark “Shit Shoes” Henwood
  • Pleasure Fielder of the Year
    Ben “Pope Benedict CXCV” Collins
  • Pleasure Bowler of the Year
    Mark “Shit Shoes” Henwood
  • Pleasure Batsman of the Year
    Adam “Post Op” Baker
  • Business Batsman of the Year
    Phil “Shandy” Childs
  • Business Fielder of the Year
    Mike “Tubby” Hall
  • Leisure Bowler of the Year
    Bavi “Satchel” Jain
  • Leisure Batsman of the Year
    Simon “Pigu” Dixon
  • Qin Shi Huang Award for Leisure Fielder of the Year
    Justyn “Scooby” Field
  • Captain’s Award for Player of the Year
    Jeff “Hollywood” James
  • President’s Award for Basher of the Year
    Sean “The Korean” Malcon
  • Bashers Legend
    Tom “Latex” Ash
Unusually quiet around here


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