Thunder, Lightning, Kung Fu Fighting!

Who expected such an icy encounter?

A relatively subdued pre-match session at the bamboo started the day. The boys gathered and awaited the arrival of “Somersault” “Woodstock” Howard. Eventually he showed, fashionably late and resisting the temptation to collapse out of his mercedes into the gutter – that would wait until later.

A quick trip to the local dairy by Neal, who had been missing in cricket action for about two decades, produced a lemonade box full of supplies to sustain the Bashers through a long day ahead.

A satellite link was procured with the Scott family who had already established a base at the ground.

Deano supplied excellent directions which were promptly ignored by a driver who was apparently late for his own wedding but eventually the BISS stadium was found after crossing the bridge over the river volga.

Then the fireworks started! The Scholars had apparently been camped out at the venue for two weeks, acclimatising to the altitude and humidity, but nothing had prepared them for what followed.

In the wash Fudan were told in no uncertain terms that they had been let off the hook by a storm of biblical proportions. Basher Bojangles was still chomping at the bit for a piece of action (he’s been waiting thirty years now) as Sanjay and Zeb speed off in the Lamborghini and the opposition swam for their lives.

Mighty Thor smote the lego pitch with the force of an empty B52 shot glass, a timult of hailstones the size and shape of kooka pies hurtled earthward and godzilla himself would have cowered and whimpered at the sound of the heavens’ thunderous roar .

The Pennsylvanian Scotts were given first leave, taking with them an indelible impression of the gentleman’s game. Meanwhile Geoff tempts fate and shows deft running skills defying his girth and dodging lightning bolts like a behemoth Sonic the Hedgehog. His cause was more than madness though as the “mixed bag” of beers had been left by the lightning rod in the middle of the parking lot.

So cricket was the loser on this particular day and the fines session was unnaturally brief.

A string of taxi drivers had their secret saturday mahjiang game at the school interrupted by hungry Bashers longing for a return to civilisation. And so off to the Shed it was.

A handful of “unavailables” were found in residence there but Andy “Here’s the ‘Ting” was granted leave on account of injuries sustained from his dominatrix.

Fudan University were unexpectedly tough competition and were last seen either giving thanks to the gods who had relieved them of a thrashing or praying for mercy, we cannot be sure which.

As for the Bashers a rigorous schedule has been laid before us in an effort by the Anti-basher to fatigue us into a beatable proposition. Good luck Mikey! Bring it on!

And as a side note the committee has been offered stakes in a “sure bet” champion steeplechase greyhound – watch this space….