As given out over curry and beer at Delhi Zaike on Friday, 28 November 2008.
- Denny Crane Award – For Most Ineffectual Figurehead:
President Mal “Omega” Collins
- Kublai Khan Award – For Empire Building:
Paul “Terror” Turner
- Roger Federer Award – For Best Return Of email:
Geoff “Slab” Howe
- Elton John Award – For Throwing Parties We Don’t Get Invited To:
Evan “Divinyl” Golbach
- Evil Kneivel Award – For Best Use of Safety Equipment:
Justyn “Scooby” Field
- Lance Armstrong Award – For Shitiest Break:
Sheyan “Dipso” Patel
- Fred Dagg Award – For Most Perverse Use Of Footwear:
Hadleigh “Sir Dick” Churchill
- Captain Cook Award – Most Miles Travelled:
Sameer “Papsmear” Jolly
- Jimmy Page Award – For Solo Performance:
Ed “Don Juan” Owen
- Greg Louganis Award – For Jumping In At The Deep End:
Sunny “KC” Sahi
- Joe Lieberman Award – For Scoring Most Runs Against the Bashers:
Andy “Tank” Scott
- Ashwarya Rai Award – For Best New Actress:
Sanjay “Jabber” Poojary
- Simba The Lion Award – For Loyalty:
John “Inquisition” L’Epagniol
- Harry Houdini Award – For Most Missed Fines:
Zeb “Camel” Khan
- Joan Rivers Award – For Fashion Critic of the Year:
Deano “Lucy” Lapthorne
- Hugh Hefner Award – For Contribution To Porn Industry:
Thomas “The Professor” Christiansen
- Fidel Castro Award – For Most Upsetting The Anti-Basher:
Andrew “Jim’s Mowing” Gardiner
- Rosa Parks Award – For Bus Tourist of the Year:
Hamish “Hammertime” Stevens
- Nadia Comaneci Award – For Best Gymnastic Performance:
Paul “Woodstock” Howard
- King Ludwig II Award – For Protecting His Castle:
Luke “Turtle” Benbow
- Bobby Ewing Award – Most Miraculous Recovery:
Rakesh “Rock” Kumar
- Captain Edward Smith Award – For Titanic Captaincy:
Denzyl “Cranky” Allwright
- Usain Bolt Award – For Best Victory Celebration:
Oliver “Stats” Austin
- Giorgio Armani Award – For Best Dressed:
Alessandro “The Jaguar” Pezzani
- Bart Simpson Award – For Sledge of the Year:
Hamish “Hammertime” Stevens
- League Fielder Of The Year:
Hadleigh “Sir Dick” Churchill
- Twenty20 Batsman of the Year:
Andrew “Jim’s Mowing” Gardiner
- League Bowler of the Year:
Sameer “Paps” Jolly
- Twenty20 Bowler of the Year:
Paul “Woodstock” Howard
- League Batsman of the Year:
Sanjay “Jabber” Poojary
- Qin Shi Huang Award – Twenty20 Fielder Of The Year:
Andre “Chopper” DeLarue
- Captain’s Award – Player Of The Year:
Oliver “Stats” Austin
- President’s Award – Basher Of The Year:
Dean “Loose Unit” Lapthorne
Sledge
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