Business vs K2 Lumberjack
The Business were in action vs K2 on Sunday, attempting to gather and reform what was left of their rectums after the unforgettable, un-consensual 389ing they received 2 weeks prior. Whites donned, rape whistles in-hand; the Business had a few changes in personnel (victims of 389 update: some still in rehab, others developed agoraphobia, one man found shivering in bed only able to mutter “Jonti”), and things were looking positive after captain Paps won the toss!
Paps electing to bat; the opening pair of Korean and Fruitbox got off to a predictably steady and underwhelming start, and the innings continued in this vein with a few pleasant injections eventually ending with a just defendable 180. Highlights included a 24 ball 50 from bride-to-be Post-op, in which he hit a plethora of big Jonties all over the park. Notable contributions from Tinder slapping a few, and an encouraging last wicket stand between Square Root and Ketchup. Ducks for Cassius and captain Paps, the latter given out LBW in controversial fashion; the ball pitching almost laughably far outside leg.
Positivity sparked into life at the break, given our bowling heavy line up; surely we could stifle their openers and plant seeds of doubt early on? Perhaps grab an early wicket and gain some momentum? Alas none of this happened. K2, thanks largely to a great innings from Waqar, were able to cruise to easy victory, getting the runs with ample time to spare. Highlights included a solid, run saving spell from Long Dong, and brilliant wicket taking spell from Ketchup. The 2 major low-lights were skipper Paps having his arse handed to him in one 30 run over (Waqar testing positive Jonti steroids post match), and Kevin “I don’t drink anymore” Cassius having to give up the gloves at drinks after a truly shocking display behind the stumps; put down to a hangover. Weird field placement of the day: deep second slip.
The Business continue their long standing relationship with the bottom of the league.