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Bashers Leisure vs The Hot Dogs – Sun 17 June – Tumbling Records?

On gathering at the Camel in the early hours, a comatose Mexican reveler slumped at the bar showed us the way forward. An uneventful bus ride later, we gather by the pitch under looming clouds. Captain informs us the oppo are practicing in the nets, sending a flutter of apprehension through our minds. Leisure is a team, lest we forget, in which donning spikes as footwear is considered “intimidating”, not to mention bothering to practice beforehand.

Our fears, however, are soon put to bed as, sent in to bat, Spanner settles in very comfortably, hitting a straight drive for four off the first ball, then following up with 3 further boundaries in the first over. This man certainly won’t die wondering. After the Hot Dogs captain takes himself after one (opening) over, the onslaught continues with a feast of runs down leg and famine on the off side. The opening partnership flourishes, Prick diving into pies and sliding his produce down leg, even holding the pose at one point to admire his own handiwork.

After Spanner retires to loud applause, having reached 51 off 18 balls with a maximum to finish, Mouse continues the fine work, taking Leisure to well beyond the 100 mark, aided in no small measure by some poor fielding on the rope and some fairly toothless bowling. The spectators are enjoying the show but on skip’s pronouncement that the game is in the bag (a weak pun involving some sort of giant satchel), wickets inevitably follow, sparking panic on the sidelines and the resulting absence of a square leg umpire for a contentious run-out call.

Some fine attacking play from Puberty, however, including one Viv-like 6 on bended knee, keeps up the momentum – enough to be forgiven for running out Tantric at least. But soon the Hot Dogs start to hold their catches, and with only brief cameos from the middle order, and finally the no.11 back in the hutch, it’s left to previously retired Spanner to re-enter the fray and bring us home, marmalising the penultimate ball of the innings for the biggest 6 of the day and then adding the 2 needed to reach bang on 200.

This had the statisticians scrambling for the record books as allegedly the highest total Leisure have reached. And all this with a player in the ranks making his first appearance on a cricket field ever. Famous local drum and bass DJ/sound engineer Dominic “Nutcup” initially refused to bat but after reluctantly conceding there was no escape had to be given a quickfire lesson in the basics from Mouse before trudging out to the middle returning not long after for a well earned 1.

Set 201 to win, the Dogs scratched around for a while before rain stopped play, Hustler employing his usual tight variety including one out the back of the hand more worthy of an up and under, as the slippery ball started to tell. Following the re-start, Hot Dogs somehow contrived to move beyond 100, somewhat to the befuddlement of the fielding team – perhaps aided by some dodgy scoring, and certainly by some wayward stuff from Pope and Spanner.

Birdshit, Dags and Tantric kept a lid on the run-rate, Pubes picked up 3 wickets and The Gear excelled behind the stumps, one dropped catch the only blot on his copybook. Some committed and athletic fielding in the wet was also a notable feature as Leisure turned the screw. Despite the captain’s show of petulance in banging the ground with his fist like a spoilt child on letting a boundary slip through, Leisure kept their heads and prevailed to record a comprehensive win and leave them sitting pretty atop Div3.

Back at the fine session, our debutant had pulled a runner so alas no pubes were swilled on this occasion. Despite this setback general merriment ensued and thoughts soon turned to next weekend’s triple header. A historic day for Leisure, and a proud day for all Bashers.

2012 Division Three


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Monday 18 June 2012 P W D L F A P
Bashers Leisure 7 6 0 1 1043 905 24
DPR Hot Dogs 6 5 0 1 863 739 20
Pudong DT 6 5 0 1 838 660 20
Daredevils CC 5 1 1 3 533 606 6
Pudong D&L 6 1 1 4 499 698 6
Dulwich Knights 10 0 2 8 787 955 4

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