Hot Dogs Crucified on Easter Sunday!

Christmas is the season to be Jolly, but Pleasure took the Easter occasion to smear the Hot Dogs with a double load of chocolate SJollyness.

The day started with Swoop being late for the bus, they moved The Camel, and hence bequeatheded the articulatenous privilegity of proclaimationing with which ya now lookn at.

We had 9 of 13 on the bus, with enroute Tampon answering the call, and with CaramelSJolly waiting at the ground for pies. But as we used the “Skiddy dropped them all on the bus seat” excuse last week, we were left with the simple truth on April Fool’s Day…we ate them all, Fuck you!

The Bashers forgoeded the nets cause our opposition were usinging them, so we took the time to win or lose the toss and prepare to bat first. It was good that we had that extra time, because Bambi needed it (and a slide rule) to figure out his batting order. In the end it was ‘fast lane/slow lane on a dual carriage way’ type stuff.

Frosty Syllabus (5 from 25) and Swoop (11 / 12) opened the batting with a job to see off the openers and they would have been successful if they had have been successful. Fucking Slow was first to go (got bowled at the clubhouse end**) bringing CaramelSJolly to the creamy centre. Swoop, not wanting to delay the SJolly show any longer, was soon quick to follow (**).

Both CaramelSJolly (14 / 20) and AlmondSJolly (11 / 10) continued the solid batting display to move the total along nicely until AlmondSJolly (**). Alas, Easter Sunday is not all about chocolate and blowjobs, we must acknowledge the importance this day has to many people. And to that, what better way to introduce the big guy’s main rep on Earth as it is in heaven…Pope. With a 9 month window to clearly move up the rankings of best cricketer in the family, Pope (56 / 77) did his honour-board best with a cracking innings that included 5 boundaries (which are fours) and 1 six.

After CaramelSJolly (**), Bambi, for comedic value more than anything else, sent in Korean (0 / 9) (**) and Skiddy (0 / 9) (**). Both clearly in a hurry in the slow lane!

Out of shit batters and not wanting to declare, Bambi (27 / 26) brought himself up/down the batting order to join Pope and raise the run rate. Pope’s innings came to an end, remarkably not bowled at the clubhouse end and just 44 runs short of his century.

Tampon (0 / 1), Damascus (3 / 1) and Tucker (3 / 2) wagged the tail to help Pleasure set 9/172, leaving the doggies scratching themselves and licking their own nuts.

The ‘fast lane/slow lane’ approach carried through to the bowling order with Tucker bringing the heat and the pressure and Swoop (1 for too many) not. Like a man not wanting to be married next, Swoop dropped a bouquet of a chance offered at gully from some fine bowling from Tucker (0 / not many) who would go unrewarded for wickets but appreciated for the softening up the openers.

Bambi, after using his fingers to count to 4, replaced a sandpaperless Swoop with CaramelSJolly (2 / not many) with immediate success. LBW! And the collapse was on. Bambi (2 / not many) apologized his way to some quick wickets with the help of Damascus at point, and all by himself with a ripper cleaned bowled.

With Bambi farked after two overs, Damascus (3 / not many) came on and duly opened with a ball to square leg, directly to square leg. But with Skiddy joining him in tandom, Damascus found the motivation and form to take more wickets, great bowilng. Skiddy (2 / not many) showed such wonderful control (control you won’t see when he orders delivery from Indian Kitchen) with all variations.

The batsmen just couldn’t hit anything, and when they did it was the TopDeckSJolly Show. When CaramelSJolly wasn’t moving the wrong way, he was moving the right way taking great catch/es. And with a new shockies in his knee-machine, AlmondSJolly went high and went low to take great catch/es, the scorecard is confusing, but someone took them.

With Bambi deciding there was enough naturally caused damage to the ball, Swoop was brought back on to take the 10^th wicket and singlehandedly win the game for Pleasure.

Well done to Pope and all the bowlers and to the Jolly brothers (from different mothers). Well Done Pleasure!