2005 Season Warm Ups – Bashers v Hot Dogs

As the eternal rivals arrived at the field the temperature had reached a sizzling and sunny 5 degrees, well above the prediction of 0 degree.

Under new skipper Ian Syer and vice captains Steve Aikman, James Gooding and 2015 skipper apprentice Ed Molony, all of the Bashers turned out early for a net session that displayed their vigour and worth.

The Hot Dogs were slow on arrival and many of the usual faces from last year were working, traveling or injured. The bun had arrived without the sausage. However there had obviously been heavy recruiting done in the off season and the innocent faces of new dogs “Pups” showed up in numbers and took instructions from resident dog, Mike Tsesmelis, who was carrying an injury that has yet to be diagnosed. The Bashers, ever mindful of a wounded dog were keen to start the season (albeit a scratch match) with a victory against the team that had caused so much pain and anguish to them the previous year.

Basher’s Skip, Compass Syer, conveyed to his team that if he won the toss he would send the Dogs into bat and allow the Bashers to bask in the comfort of the high sun on the field. It was no surprise at all to the Bashers when he returned to say he HAD won the toss and elected to BAT. Such is the confidence that the Bashers have in their new captain they all suspected method in the madness.

Terror Turner and Jonty Finocchiaro were the first offerings to the depleted Dogs (complimented with two Bashers, one with a hundred years experience in the formidable shape of Paul Howard and the 15 minute experience of Norm’s mate Zac who proceeded to have an outstanding 20 minutes on the field for the “Pups”).

The openers put on 36 before Jonty Finoch decided to put reason aside and attempt to heave Tavis over the mid wicket boundary only to find his castle crumbled. Turner compiled a quick 31 before being caught on the boundary by fellow Basher, Paul Howard. Chook Aikman, true to form, threatened with the bat only to stand his ground when Umpire Hodgson a la “The Assassin” gave him leg before. It took the calmness and gentlemanly behaviour of captain in waiting Molony to see Aikman leave without recourse.

Scott Brown, greeted with full tosses to get his eye in and James Gooding steadied the ship for a period giving hope that the Bashers were heading towards a score of respectability. Umesh was brought on to bowl and the state of the game changed dramatically.  The aforementioned pair were dismissed having starts and despite glimmers of hope from Lucas, Norm, Cain and a selfless skipper coming in last, Umesh( 5-14) ripped through the Bashers managing just 116 runs leaving Hodgson to deliberate what could have been, stranded on a very promising 1.

Despite their absent stars, the opposition were like greyhounds at the slip, keen to maul the petty Bashers total. However, like rabbits in the lights the dogs opened with two ole mongrels in the shape of McIlroy (run out by the nimble and slight Finoch) and followed hard upon by Cameron (bowled), the dogs were licking their wounds at 2 wkts for 4. However with Tavis playing in purebred fashion this youngish dog muzzled his way through the Basher’s bowlers stealing juicy bones that placed them in a winning position. Cometh the hour cometh the man.

Skip Compass threw the ball to Gooding and the game would change forever. Gooding, with his heavily pregnant wife (Twee) on the sidelines spurred her man on in the just his first ball to have the stubborn Pathak bowled.

An appeal for lbw (turned down) ensued and the madness began.

Gooding in his next delivery finally convinced Umpire Sanjay that the ball was to hit the stumps and Levy without levy was gone. Howard arrived and was snarled at by angry Bashers as they crowded in around their teammate’s bat the ball after, and either through poor technique or benevolence to his real team his stumps were crashed through. A delay due to Gooding’s wrecking meant the Dogs had no one padded. With the Bashers keen to see one of their founding sons breakthrough with his maiden hat trick, finally the anti-Basher arrived in person. Mike Tsesmelis whose very name mentioned sees Bashers bring out their MT voo doo dolls arrived in usual style. Impervious to the bating banter, serious in stature the anti-basher took guard as the Basher’s sniffed Mike’s demise. Gooding fueled with adrenalin let it go wide and the hat trick gone. The next ball with the Bashers still in a hair’s breadth of the waiting willow saw Gooding bowl a ball just short of a length that made AB go back and played the ball directly downward with the inertia heading toward the stumps. A futile attempt to kick the ball away allowed the ball to follow its true path and crashed into the stumps sending the Bashers into a spasm that hadn’t been seen since last Thursday evening at Malone’s.

With just the dogged Tavis and the final tail the end looked near. Tavis was caught trying to slam the dogs home with a Gooding chest mark and the rest was a dog’s breakfast. Bashers by 38.

Beware the wounded dog!!!

Paul Turner