{"id":17199,"date":"2019-06-15T09:32:34","date_gmt":"2019-06-15T01:32:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/?p=17199"},"modified":"2021-05-20T15:22:05","modified_gmt":"2021-05-20T07:22:05","slug":"nanjing-2019-lumberjack","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/nanjing-2019-lumberjack\/","title":{"rendered":"Nanjing 2019 Lumberjack"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

It was a bittersweet weekend for the tourists as the\nsweetness of a fun weekend of drinking, revelry and a little bit of cricket was\ncountered by having to see fisty cymbal\u2019s baws on several occasions, the\nappearance of fisty\u2019s swag bag each time completely unprompted. I can also attest\nthat fisty\u2019s secretions left a bittersweet fragrance on my pillow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The tourists minus Paps, Fisty, & Rooty, but honoured by\nthe attendance of Basher No.1 Shrek, met Friday afternoon at Hongqiao and\nboarded the train for Nanjing.  This year\u2019s\njourney was a more sophisticated affair than previous years as Omega had\narranged first class travel, the seasoned veteran having had enough of slumming\nit in second class through the years. The added comfort afforded by the slightly\nbigger chairs and the complimentary bottle of coke was well appreciated as was\nthe award winning gin provided by A\u2019L\u2019Orange. To the gin was added lemon and\nrosemary,  the aromatics released by our sloshing\nand quaffing diffused through the cabin and attracted a new friend who was\nwelcomed with a glass of A\u2019L\u2019Orange\u2019s champion spirit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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A’L’Orange on cocktail duties<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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How the other half live in 1st Class<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

We were enjoying ourselves so much that disembarking the train at Nanjing came around all too soon, we could\u2019ve kept on the train to Beijing without too much discomfort as long as there was still gin and we hadn\u2019t run out of rosemary.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Quick check in at the hotel, shower and back downstairs to\nmeet the Nanjing lads at the pub nearby for a night of drinking. It is hard to\nsay what happened that evening with any sense of confidence. Paps & Rooty arrived\nfrom somewhere, Fisty had driven from the 4th<\/sup> tier city he calls\nhome and his ballbag had yet to make an appearance.   Mouse was\nalso there for a bit, or did I imagine that? This year\u2019s set up was very\nconvenient; a short walk from the hotel to the first pub was followed by a\nshort walk round the corner to another pub.  Birdy fell asleep on a chair for a while but\nmanaged to keep drinking. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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nice tits<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The main turning point of the evening came towards midnight\nwhen Shrek bought a round of 8 Tequilas for 7 people. As Leisure captain, Fisty\ndid the honours and sank the extra one and suddenly the brakes were off. On\nreturning for a night cap at Shrek and Tampon\u2019s room, Fisty instantly stripped\noff and started writhing uncontrollably first in Shrek\u2019s bed and then Tampon\u2019s.\nThe gallery of Shrek, Tampon, Birdy, Natural and Omega were treated to some\nanatomical close ups of Fisty\u2019s Greek Balls. As the rantallion beast thrashed\nwildly, everything was contaminated by his essence, the  sheets, the pillow, the duvet and even the valance\nwere all soiled. Fisty was soon bundled into the corridor and back to his room\nbut departed without his pants which remained outside our room door until the\nmorning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Tampon’s bed<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Fisty’s pants remained intouched in the corridor all night<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The tour had definitely taken a turn for the gayer as video\nappeared of Rooty and Paps showering together after the pub. Explanation still\npending. Meanwhile Friendzone searched for the pool in the dark on his own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We awoke nice and early for breakfast the next day, ready to play some cricket. Despite the horrors witnessed in our room the previous evening, the cleaning staff upon entering probably wouldn\u2019t have known any wiser. The same could not be said when they entered Omega and Birdy\u2019s room as it appeared Omega had had a complete loss of bladder control. The stain was actually caused by a spilt glass of Berocca but the scene could easily be mistaken for a very dehydrated man having massively pissed the bed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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it was Berocca, honestly!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

After a quick breakfast and an improvised esky, we went to\nthe ground for the cricket. The Bashers were split into two teams, captained\nrespectively by Natural and Friendzone. Selection was made by who could sink a\nbeer the fastest, the quickest six in one team, the rest in the other team.\nThis meant we ended up with a drinking team headed by Natural and Friendzone\u2019s\nserious simon\u2019s team. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

First up was Bashers vs Bashers. Birdy, opening the batting\nfor Natural Bashers, carried his bat and finished the innings with a straight\nsix! Birdy now pushing 18 months without being dismissed in a match but in the\nend the team only scored about 30 off 5 overs which was chased down by FZ\nbashers in 3 overs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Oh no, not again!!!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The other teams in what could loosely be described as a competition were the Bogans and the Nongmin.  In general, the games were quite high scoring with a lot of sixes hit even though there was a lot of uneven bounce in the \u2018wicket\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Could this tour get any gayer?!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The main thing was we were having a good time, we enjoyed Bloody Mary\u2019s for our morning aperitif followed by Rum Coke and all supported by a steady flow of beers. It wasn\u2019t long before Fisty\u2019s space hopper reared it\u2019s ugly head again and everyone had to avert their eyes, including the three ladys who were present. Firsty showing complete disregard for the morals of the #metoo generation. Fisty was a hit with the Nanjing guys and was christened a new name by Johnny from the Bogans of \u2018Ancient Ric Flair\u2019    Wooooooo!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Bloody Marys all round<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The Sledge was played for twice, firstly by FZ Bashers and\nsecondly by Natural Bashers.  As seems to\nbe the usual order of events, the Bashers contrived to lose the sledge in the\nfirst match then won it back when it really mattered and we returned back to\nShanghai still in possession of the fabled trophy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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what a bunch o kunts<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Birdshit goes off <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Bashers Bring Sledge Home <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Bogans take sledge early<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Nongmin clean up Naturals <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Bogans v Nongmin WGAF <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Without any real conclusion to the competition except for we\nhad run out of booze, it was time to leave the pitch and head to a local boozer\nfor the fine session. The last thing I remember is telling Friendzone to study\nhard and not be such a cunt, then I woke up and it was Sunday.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

From all accounts, it seems Saturday was a quieter affair, after the excesses of Friday night and a whole day of drinking everyone was a bit tired. It soudned like Saturday turned out the same way as Friday, the two local pubs were visited again and then everyone went home. Rooty missed his train home and stayed at Fisty\u2019s, I dread to imagine what happened in their room that night. If anyone has anything to add about Saturday, please feel free<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The next morning Friendzone finally located the pool and after a quick dip, we checked out and were off to catch the train. Omega was fined 500RMB for \u2018damaging the bed\u2019. On the way home we enjoyed  Bourbon  courtesy of Shrek (still in first class) before some of us went to Cages for a quick drink before saying goodbye and returning to our normal lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

All in all a short but sweet tour, the sights of which will\nremained burnt into the memory until the next time we shower after a game at\nSCSC.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It was a bittersweet weekend for the tourists as the sweetness of a fun weekend of drinking, revelry and a little bit of cricket was countered by having to see fisty cymbal\u2019s baws on several occasions, the appearance of fisty\u2019s swag bag each time completely unprompted. I can also attest that fisty\u2019s secretions left a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11389,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[455,16,17],"tags":[170],"class_list":["post-17199","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-lumberjack","category-sixes","category-tours","tag-nanjing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17199","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11389"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17199"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17199\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18416,"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17199\/revisions\/18416"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17199"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17199"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/basherscc.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17199"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}